How I Became a Famous Novelist

- Blurb -

A razor-sharp evisceration of celebrity culture and literary fame, How I Became a Famous Novelist is a satirical novel masquerading as a tell-all memoir. What Pete Tarslaw wants is simple enough: FAME Realistic amount. Enough to open new avenues of sexual opportunity. Personal assistant to read mail, grocery shop, etc. FINANCIAL COMFORT Never have a job again. Retire. Spend rest of life lying around, pursuing hobbies (boating? skeet shooting?). STATELY HOME BY THE OCEAN (OR SCENIC LAKE) Spacious library, bay windows, wet bar. HD TV, discreetly placed. Comfortable couch. HUMILIATE EX-GIRLFRIEND AT HER WEDDING. Sick of life as he knows it, he sets out to write a bestselling novel, armed with a formula for success cobbled together from previous bestsellers: he abandons truth, relies heavily on lyrical prose, creates a club with a mysterious mission, includes a murder and invokes 'confusing sadness' at the end. Once the sales rankings for The Tornado Ashes Club start their meteoric rise - thanks to a Christian evangelist, a recovering teen starlet and Law and Order: Criminal Intent Tarslaw's inevitable decline looms, and his fall from grace will be nothing short of spectacular. How I Became a Famous Novelist is the hilarious tale of how Pete Tarslaw's 'pile of garbage' became the most talked about, read, admired and reviled novel in America. It will change everything you think you know about literature, appearance, truth, beauty, and those people out there who still care about books.